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| Two go in, one comes out. |
Vanity in Peril kicks off the summer with a new Wednesday feature we like to call My Commercial Mascot is Better Than Yours (we're still working on that title) pitting well-known commercial icons and some that are relatively new to the game against each other in an effort to secure advertising world domination. This week Vanity in Peril compares two products that we suspect are made with the same fattening ingredients. The products come from two food chains that have been utilized more often than most families cook in. Other than on weekends ,when I have more time to my leisure, I usually am unable to give myself enough time in the morning to stop and make breakfast. If I do, it's usually just a blueberry waffle or a yogurt with granola. Not anything grand like eggs Benedict or a slab of bacon. No... no... I leave my strawberry crepes to my Saturday mornings. On a Wednesday, I'm lucky if I make it out of the house with a handful of Cheerios.
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| Which pretty much guarantees me getting this platter at the Tomboy's. |
What's odd to me is that if I don't have time to grab anything at breakfast and don't want to indulge in something greasy and fatty at lunch, I will usually try and stop (like most of us nowadays) and get something on the road. This usually ends up being the Dunkin Donuts for me. It's fast, it's easy... they always get the cream to sugar ratio just right in my coffee. What's not to love? The odd part is that I end up getting the fattiest sandwich on the menu instead of eating light as I would had I had time at home. That would be their sausage, egg and cheese sandwich on a buttered croissant. It's ridonkulous. It's like eating a heart attack. The bread is so saturated with butter that it almost melts on your tongue. (I know!) But this sandwich is just about the least healthy thing a person can eat in the morning besides one of those jumbo chocolate muffins they serve at coffee shops. And maybe this decadent sandwich wouldn't be all that bad if it wasn't for the jumbo iced drink that I get to go with it to cool me down in the warm pre-summer heat. I try not to get them but they are so right in all the right ways, I just can't help myself. But I'm not the only one. Millions of other gluttonous people get up each day and do the same thing. Dunkin Donuts knows this and that's why they just came out with this product:
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| It's like Christmas in July... in your mouth! |
Now I would never go as far as to order this drink instead of my morning coffee but I have seen the commercials on t.v. for this product and I will admit that it looks amazing. Either that or it looks like it would cause you to go into cardiac arrest (or both). Thus far I've been able to go on with my life without this chocolatey treat but the really hot weather is here and I know it's just a matter of time until I fall to temptation. This product has garnered so much fan appreciation from college frat boys and middle aged men that YouTube even has several uploaded videos of people losing their frochocoginity and challenging each other to drink the whole thing. Have you had one yet? My assumption is that the only activity that need be put on your "to-do" list for the day after consuming one would be "take a nap". I have a slight upper hand on Dunkin Donuts though. I was in this same conundrum last summer with the introduction of the McDonald's frappe.
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| El Diablo! |
I'm fairly sure that I'm not going to fall to temptation for the DD frozen hot chocolate because I bet they taste strangely similar to the mocha frappes from last summer. These goodies ran in commercials for a couple of weeks before I finally caved in and drove down to the nearest Mickey D's and ordered one (with a small fry to "balance" out my salt to sweet ratio). They were definitely delicious that first round or two however by the third one I was ready to go off chocolate and check myself into a hospital. I don;t want to go through that again. As it stands, the entire concept of a product that is supposed to be enjoyed hot being served frozen is complete holiday blasphemy. That's bad enough in my book to go ahead and give the points to McDonald's. While clearly both drinks are bad bad bad for your health, at least McDonald's got there first.
--- Vanity in Peril
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