Vanity in Peril!: ABC Cancels All My Children and Replaces it with... Well Something Way Worse.

Daytime television is in a state of restructuring. With the economy (still) in the toilet, original programing has been pushed off the air to make way for the much cheaper to produce reality t.v. With two more soap operas being canceled at the end of the season, you may be asking yourselves? Who's next? It can be argued that reality television is no more based in reality than an episode of Days of Our Lives. Heck, Marlena Evans went through being possessed and kidnapped and still managed to play a more believable character than "real-life-person" Audrina Patridge. Be that as it may, reality programming has taken over daytime and those networks not ready to prepare for it will be left out in the cold. We had the ~~dumb~~ great idea to re purpose some of today's most popular daytime programming to fit the more "reality-based" aesthetic. We present you with the first in the series:

Bravo Channel's Real HousePuppets of Sesame Street

Last time we caught up with the Housepuppets, the circle was reeling from the news of the breakup between the Cookie Monster and Abby Cadabby. It had only been a week since the well publicized split and Abby was already being spotted around town with her new paramour, Colombian crooner- Juanes. Not to be outdone in the public forum, Mr. Monster decided to go back to his one true love; cookies.

Spotted drinking Mimosas at Chateau Marmont. See, they're just like us!

Meanwhile, over at Casa de Grover, Carmelo Anthony and Amare Stoudemire played a game of pick-up and spread the news that sworn-enemy, Oscar the Grouch had been seen canoodling in his trash-can with Grover's ex, Rachel Ray.

I've known Rachel for 10 years you guys! She would never do that to me.

Not one to base his puppety opinions off of mere hearsay, Grover decided to confront Oscar himself. But first he decides to stop off at his loyal friends and dedicated lifepartners, Ernie and Bert's lovely home. With the emergence of pro-gay icon's in the media recently such as lady Gaga, Neil Patrick Harris and the couple on the ever popular Modern Family, Bert and Ernie no longer felt the need to hide their relationship.

We just got back from the Hampton's with the Count and Countess and boy did we have a blast. I think tonight's the night we push the beds together.

Grover had a blast drinking mimosas with the boys but soon needed to jet off to meet the Grouch at his place. If the rumors were true, he wanted to hear it from the stinky man himself. On his way over, he received a text asking if they could meet up at the W instead for brunch. Without delay, Grover high-tailed it in the opposite direction toward the hotel.

Grover hopes they have those yummy little mini-quiches Grover likes.

On the other side of town Elmo was having a heated discussion with once homeboy, Chris Brown. Chris and Elmo were really close back in the day but things had cooled ever since Elmo was rumored to have had a fling with pop princess, Katie Perry, close friend to Chris's ex, Rhianna.

So when you all hang out together, does she ever mention me? Come on you can tell me.

Next Time on the Real Housepuppets of Sesame Street:

Oscar confronts Elmo on leaking his Eskimo-kiss tape with Rachel Ray to the press and airing his extremely dirty laundry on the Wendy Williams Show...